"Surrender it the moment it floats up, the moment you glimpse it. Surrender everything the moment you become aware. Even if you think you are certain you know what to do."
― my Twin Flame's higher self
I am again and again giving up trying to figure things out. Learning to surrender when I can't see the way forward or make sense of the disintegration, the letting go, the emerging new consciousness and the dying old self.
I'm also having the disorienting experience of trying to do divination through timelines. I am moving through such huge vibrational shifts that my cards can't see through them until they happen.
Your intuition breaks down as you leave the Matrix. The intuition has been running on old programming, filtering through a closed, self-contained reality that doesn't actually encompass ALL of reality.
Sometimes all I can do is just stay with the exact feelings and trust the intelligence of my body. It's when I try to understand it or plan ahead that I get tangled up.
And sometimes I get caught in traps anyway. This is a messy, horrifying death of a nightmare reality, and dealing with blowback from abusive people who are enraged by my healing is unavoidable.
I have no idea what comes next - no ability to even divine what comes next, which is new to me - and that is terrifying.
When the Divine Mother told me that the Tower would crash this summer, She wasn't kidding.