I have to be careful of what I say here, because this could be interpreted in a psychological way. The truth is no therapeutic model can explain this.
Love cannot exist in a sick paradigm of separation consciousness, narcissism, and soul-rape.
In order to leave that sick paradigm of separation consciousness, narcissism, and soul-rape, entire inner personality facets die off and sometimes it feels like an old self is dying so a new self can be born. In my case, I can feel my Twin Flame connection getting stronger inside my heart, while on the outside the trauma bonds between him and I are dying off. Ancient trauma bonds that go back to the moment when the Divine Father and Divine Mother of all creation turned into God and Satan.
This is the end of ancient enmeshment so that soul individuation can occur - and that is the sacred division that needs to happen before Twin Flames merge in Harmonious Union.
My Twin Flame and I are going through opposite but complementary initiation processes. His involves giving away power and descending, while mine involves claiming power and ascending. And that is just one, very small way to describe it.
Hekate will retreat from me if I share Her magical secrets with my Twin. While Hekate supports Twin Flame Union, it's also true that She does not support my Twin Flame at his current vibration.
I am going through a separate initiation process with Her, and my Twin Flame is not invited to the Divine Feminine's mysteries. That is Her strict rule. She will not initiate me if I cannot keep Her mysteries secret - because my Twin has to grow up before he is welcomed inside Hekate's temple. I can either have my Divine Feminine awakening, or I can have a confining, codependent trauma bond with my Twin.
I can either claim my power as a Hekatean Divine Feminine, or I can give up my birthright and make myself small for a man, as Arwen did for Aragorn.
And yet there is another universe - a universe where my Twin and I are fully equal in spiritual power. That is the universe of Harmonious Twin Flame Union, and this is the part that is difficult to talk about.
There is occult phenomena that happens when one universe is dying and another universe is being born. Weird time shit. The breaking of scientific laws. The experience of clashing rules of reality, almost as if the God that created one universe is in conflict with the God that created another universe, and their laws don't go together.
If you know you know.
There is also grief, letting go, loss of meaning, and the death of identity on many levels.
This path is real, but it's also insane.