One reason this psychic censorship is breaking is because I am healing a malicious disconnect between myself and the river of Saraswati: the Mother of the Vedas, the Mother of the Harappans, the Mother of Seers.
When unblocked, when Her torrent bursts the dam, formerly censored words can gush out muddily instead of flowing gracefully. Dysregulated, traumatized, primal truth. Uncomfortable, terrifying, existential truth that has been locked in the Underworld for centuries.
It's gushing out now, so people had better fucking get used to it. The river might be coming out slowly, but once She bursts free, She's going to come all the way out. And I know people are going to panic - they're already panicking and trying to shut me up.
I cannot tell you how many people have tried to get me to stop. How many people have wanted me to give up. I have had shit happen that you wouldn't believe, but I kept motherfucking going each time because She would not have it any other way.
Because I know what is Real versus what is a lie.
Some of my closest friends, people who began this curse-breaking process with me and who did a lot of work with me, eventually abandoned the path because they would rather be happy robots eating fake steak like Cypher. I have seen so many people abandon themselves for money, for pretty lies, for vanity and selfishness and "fun".
And then trolls sometimes come here and try to get me to shut up and give up.
They're too late. This thing is now unstoppable.
When the river is finally flowing, the things She is going to say will make this blog look like a fucking Disney movie. And that's why it's probably going to express in my off-line life for a long while before it ever comes online here.
Waking up my authentic voice is like resurrecting a cold corpse. What they did to my connection with Saraswati goes into the deepest, darkest core of the rape of my soul. Yes, RAPE.
What they didn't know is that Saraswati is the deepest mystery imaginable. She not only knows Vak, but She knows its thieves.
If liars, plagiarists and thieves knew how terrifying Saraswati really is, they would cut out their own tongues in horror.
Do you think Saraswati has survived from the Indus Valley era, through disaster and genocide and multiple attempts to wipe out Her spiritual legacy, by being peaceful, sattvic and sweet? Where do you think I get my grit and sharp tongue from, but from my irrepressible Divine Mother?
Not only did She survive from the Bronze Age, but through Her power, Vedic mantras also survived from the Bronze Age. And that is how my Twin and I have survived what was done to us.
Saraswati is the Genius that endures, the Wisdom that is resilient, the Hidden River that flows where soul-rapers cannot follow. She is the Voice of Truth, the staying power, and the power by which the Truth survives against all odds.
Her children are the heretics whose books were burned and whose heads were chopped off because they refused to speak anything but the truth. Who wrote poetry and music that could get them killed, whose research and books offended academia and got them canceled by the establishment, and who kept going anyway because people like us Do Not Give A Fuck.
So I'm not giving up. And you had better not give up either. Live your damn truth whether your haters like it or not. The trolls and the robot-humans are dying out, and this is their last desperate flail before their extinction.
Good luck if they plan on going up against Her.